I have never liked being in front of a camera. Until I started my blog - really, until I started SPC - there are very few pictures of me in this universe. I had this grand idea that my child might like proof that we lived on the earth together in unison - so I specifically decided to start being part of the picture.
It wasn’t easy to overcome this bizarre fear associated with public portraiture. I still flush when people stop and stare when I’m snapping away in public - and dear Lord, if they ask to help. I don’t know how famous photographers take some of the shots they do. I am in awe of their balls.
I have used my self portraits as therapy - they inspire me to write, and I’ve become more comfortable with my physical appearance.. when in all honesty it’s been a problem for me. I won’t write my personal list of “Holli hates” in this post… my broken bones, my scars - all the things wrong with my face - wouldn’t that be absurd?
I started this post and just naturally I lean towards the negative. Why don’t I feel comfortable writing towards the positive? Sometimes I feel like it’s not a good thing to like me, to like the way I look at all. I find myself beating me up frequently because that seems like a better alternative.
Absurd.
Words… Camera… Which one is worse - or does it even matter?
Astute Observation and Amazing Photo by Pumkinlittle.
Bits and Pieces… of a happy life.
Until next week,
